In his poem The Wasteland, T.S. Elliot tells us that April is the cruellest month. It’s a reference to depression and suicide rates. And while I’m a bit of a fan of the poem, I’m afraid I’m beginning to disagree with Elliot’s assertion about April. Surely, in a world of PSR frustrations, January is miles more cruel for us Newcastle fans.
Of course, I’m being a bit dramatic, but I’d defy anyone to tell me that January in Toon terms isn’t at the very least an enormous pain in the arse.
There are many reasons for this, the chief one being those three dreaded letters…PSR. The ludicrous financial fair play rules that make it practically impossible to achieve anything close to fair play. That is of course unless you have to be one of a clutch of clubs that the whole system was designed to favour in the first place. Or that you’re just Chelsea.
In summer, our spending was rendered almost pointless as PSR forced us to sell two bright talents in Elliot Anderson and Yankuba Minteh, two players who would have almost certainly been in and around the first team for these last 5 months and then for years to come. Frankly, we’d all rather have kept Anderson than gained Odysseas Vlachodimos, as funny as his name might be. In fact, it might be argued that Anderson was a better third choice keeper than the Greek, given that he’s barely had a look in during his time at the club. Put simply, what Anderson and Minteh offered was well worth keeping and the rules shouldn’t be dictating that kind of decision when a club simply doesn’t have the financial need to have to make it. Nor should the rules be used against clubs resulting in weakening squads.
The argument about our ‘richest owners in world football’ has been done to death and there’s no point crying about it here, but it’s safe to say that PSR isn’t the thing that’s keeping us financially safe. And that’s the case for many other clubs too. While clubs being in financial trouble is no joke given their status at the heart of many communities, how many have actually gone out of business? Not many in the grand scheme of things and when you are as financially independent as we are and as responsible with spending, PSR is irrelevant.
Face it, PSR is the ruin of the transfer window, a death knell not just for ridiculous spending that clubs can’t afford, but in many cases just spending of any kind. The majority of clubs won’t spend anything because of the PSR deadline in June! It makes the January transfer window almost obsolete and with that begins to threaten the Premier League’s grand claim of being the best league in the world. Clubs can’t buy anyone in order to help change their fortunes, which only goes to add more weight to the anti-competition accusations. In Newcastle United terms, it makes the wealth of our owners just another frustration and helps make January in particular, the cruellest month. To use an idiom, we’re all dressed up with nowhere to go.
Things get worse when you look at the spending of other clubs. As I write, Manchester City – with 115 charges still against them in terms of previous spending, by the way – have so far spent £122m. And I know that their turnover is far higher than ours…but still. Villa have spent money and continue to be linked with players, Spurs have spent money and it looks like there will be more, Ipswich have spent £20m and even Bournemouth, Wolves and Southampton have spent a bit. And there will be more, you can bet. PSRwise, how does this work?
Meanwhile, we’re told time and again that it will be very unlikely that we’ll spend money, despite players being moved on. The reasoning that we’re saving it until summer doesn’t fill me with much hope either. I’ve heard it before. We’ve all heard it before. And given our actual financial situation, it’s all the more frustrating.
Then we get to Chelsea, who so far this January haven’t spent a penny. But they will. And if it was just because they have a huge turnover, that would be ok. But we all know that it’s not. So far, the Premier League have sanctioned the selling of two of their hotels to themselves as well as the sale of their women’s team…to themselves. It doesn’t fill you with much confidence about the whole cartel argument and the way that the Premier League seems to look the other way as Chelsea take the piss. And we could cast our eyes Manchester United’s way for similar shenanigans as ‘allowances’ are made for them because of Covid expenses. Not a privilege that will ever be extended to us by Mr. Masters, I’m sure. And I’m sure that any even remotely similar transactions on our part would come under ridiculous amounts of scrutiny too. It’s enough to bend the mind of any Toon fan as we endure another barren January.
What makes January even worse for me personally though is the constant links and hard luck stories that we get from the press. So far this month we must have been linked to at least 40 different players. The excellent NUFC.com list 20 different links on the Rumours page at time of writing, while the Chronicle seem to have a story saying that we’re either ‘watching, ‘tracking’, ‘monitoring’ or ‘interested in’ several players on a daily basis. What do these things even mean? And if we’re never signing these players who ultimately end up elsewhere, what’s the point in even scouting them at all, let alone ‘monitoring’ them?
The story that really got my January goat was when the agent of Khusanov, the centre half who went to Manchester City, told the Chronicle that we were ‘very close to the deal’ and that we were ‘last to leave the race with City’! The last to leave the race is small consolation when actually it just means that we didn’t sign anyone again!
Despite all of this, I still scan the websites, read the papers and will inevitably be tuned to Sky Sports News on deadline day, as ever, in the hope that something, just something will happen. Despite Eddie Howe being pretty consistent in telling reporters that any signings are unlikely, I live in the same state of hope that we probably all do. Why do we bother though? January is definitely the cruellest month…and that’s before you even give a thought to Arsenal fans and their obsession with Alexander Isak!
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