Tag: Premier League

Gallowgate Cult Heroes: Number 6 Mirandinha

Have you ever bought something based more on the way it looks on a shelf than for it’s actual quality? Ever rushed in and made an impulse buy without really thinking it through? I definitely have. For some reason with me it’s hats that bring out the impulse buyer, despite my little head. Newcastle United’s weakness in the past hasn’t quite been so specific; just footballers in general.

It’s fair to say that Newcastle United have never been afraid to gamble. We’ve always been fans of causing a bit of a stir. From spoiling Sir Stanley Matthews’ day in Cup Finals, signing Chilean brothers at a time when most Geordies couldn’t have found Chile on a map to…well you could bring it up almost to the present day when you think about it. I mean, after a couple of years of being here no one suspected what we were about to unearth in Joelinton did they?

One such gamble was the 1987 signing of Brazilian international, Mirandinha or to give him his full name, Francisco Ernani Lima da Silva. Signed from Palmeiras for the princely sum of £575,000, Mira had just scored at Wembley for Brazil in a Rouse Cup game against England. So of course, we jumped in two footed to sign the first Brazilian to play in English football as a replacement for Peter Beardsley, who just left to head to Liverpool. Clearly due diligence wasn’t so much of an everyday phrase back then.

Fifteen-year-old me was thrilled through. My logic was that he was Brazilian and so he couldn’t possibly be anything but class. I mean, I’d watched the 1982 World Cup and been gutted when that amazing Brazil team had got knocked out and I’d also seen plenty of footage of that Brazil ’70 side. My young brain imagined that all Brazilian footballers would measure up the same, like there was just something in the water in those parts!

Remember, this was a long time before Fumaca would grace our club, so my thinking wasn’t quite as stupid as it sounds. I mean, Mira was quick and I’d just watched him score at Wembley as well, so what could possibly go wrong?

To be fair to Mirandinha, things didn’t really go immediately wrong. After an introduction to St. James’ Park before a home game versus Nottingham Forest where he decided to wear a white suit, Mira made his debut a few days later at Norwich. Watching the highlights on the Tyne Tees news the following evening, I was impressed. Mainly, this was based around his ability to run really quickly and shoot from around half a mile from goal, but to teenage Graham, this was exciting stuff. Especially when you think I’d spent the few years before this watching the likes of George Reilly, Tony Cunningham and Billy Whitehurst stomp across the turf at St. James’.

It didn’t take long for Mira to gain his own song. Older readers will remember it fondly…perhaps more fondly than you’ll remember the player, in fact. “We’ve got Mirandinha, he’s not from Argentina, he’s from Brazil, he’s f***in’ brill”. Clearly, this one had more the influence of Black Lace than The Smiths, but it was mildly funny and soon caught on. The other chant of just repeating ‘Dinha, Dinha, Dinha’ was stodgy by comparison.

Mira scored his first goals in a 2-2 draw at Old Trafford in the September. The first was a free kick from just outside the box, while the second was a header at the far post from a corner. He quickly struck up a good relationship with the young Paul Gasgoigne with Gazza often supplying the passes for Mira’s runs and Mira ignoring Gazza in favour of having yet another shot when the situation was ever reversed. The same would be said for Mira’s strike partner Paul Goddard who would often be left screaming at the Brazilian in frustration when he’d shot rather than passed to our far better placed number 9.

The unlikely friendship with Gazza also led to some quite strange English lessons and on more than one occasion Mira would answer innocent questions with a tirade of swearing, much to the young Geordie’s amusement.

In his first season Mirandinha was a relative success, even if he was easily the most greedy player I’d seen outside of school. He reminded me of the kid who brought the ball to school and would insist on playing by his rules as a result. Still, he managed to score 13 goals in 32 appearances in that first season and all seemed well. But this is Newcastle United remember…

We sold Gazza before the 88/89 season and frankly, the team fell apart. Mirandinha would only score 11 goals in a fractious season and was sold back to Palmeiras at the end of it, with the club finishing bottom of the league and being relegated back to the old Division 2. He was a more surly, unsettled and moody presence during that second season, making less and less contribution as the season went on.

In fact, my most stand out memory of Mirandinha came after one particular game, rather than during. It was an FA Cup 5th round tie against Wimbledon and I remember suffering with the usual bout of mindless optimism as I got to the ground. We’ve all been there as Toon fans. But this was our year, as far as I was concerned.

We got beat 3-1 and stunk the place out. Now those two teams didn’t like each other and so at full time, frustration got the better of Mira, who first refused to shake Andy Thorn’s hand and then – incredibly and before my very eyes – ran up behind the Don’s keeper, Dave Beasant and launched a flying kick at his arse before sprinting down to hide behind Peter Jackson who was innocently heading towards the temporary changing rooms at the back of the Leazes. To this day I still can’t quite believe what I witnessed, and it remains my abiding memory Mirandinha’s short time at Newcastle and one of my most vivid memories of any game as a Newcastle fan after 40 odd years of support.

You could argue that Mirandinha was just a case of the right club at the wrong time. He arrived at the back end of the McKeag years, not long before Sir John Hall bought the club and brought Kevin Keegan back. Maybe Keegan could have got a better tune out of our first Brazilian.

Undoubtedly, Mira possessed the raw ingredients to be a success and his record of 24 goals in 71 appearances is hardly bad. Remember these were very different times for English football and there were literally no other Brazilians or even Portuguese speakers in the squad. In fact if I remember rightly, when he signed he was the only foreign player on the books. The change of culture alone would have been incredibly difficult to deal with, let alone the difference weather!

As it was though, Mirandinha was an experiment that didn’t quite work and most likely an attempt by the board to bring in a cheap replacement for Beardsley, who had gone to Liverpool for three times as much as Mira cost. Mira was lightening quick, strong and very direct; equal measures edge of the seat excitement and tearing your hair out in frustration. But for a while he was the darling of St. James’ Park. Definitely a bit of a cult hero.

Footnote: While researching this I came across Mirandinha’s managerial record and was so astounded by what I found that I thought I had to share. Having played for 12 clubs, including Palmeiras on 3 separate occasions he would then go on to manage a total of 20 clubs in both his native Brazil but also Saudi Arabia, Malaysia and Sudan. Staggering. From learning English from Gazza to managing a club in the Sudanese Premier League; amazing when you think about it!

Farewell to Dan Ashworth, the Alan Titchmarch of sporting directors.

So, after what has sometimes felt like some kind of drawn out soap opera storyline, it seems like it’s happening. Our sporting director, Dan Ashworth, has seemingly asked to leave in order to take on a similar role at Manchester United. Newcastle have rightly placed him on another spell of gardening leave and rightly so.

But is it really that big a deal and will anything particularly change at Newcastle?

Despite a social media frenzy of good riddances and doubts about his ability in the role, I think it’s clear to see that Ashworth has made some positive changes in his short time in the job and I’m disappointed by his lack of commitment. I wrote about them in another piece last year, so I won’t bang on too much here, but there have been positives. It’s just that we won’t see them bearing fruit for some time to come.

Ashworth was largely responsible for the signing of Yankuba Minteh, who if his early season form for Feyenoord is anything to go by, has the potential to go on and be a real star in the Premier league. On top of that, there have been some notable additions to our academy set up. Some of us have already witnessed a little of what Travis Hernes and Trevan Sanusi can do, but there are others such as the likes of the young Leo Shahar, Kacey Wooster and Michael Mills down the age groups, all brought in under Ashworth’s influence.

Ashworth has also overseen the development of the scouting network, with the club now very well equipped in terms of assigned scouts to various areas of the world. A number of top level appointments have been made over the last 18 months in order to build a network of people working for the club in order to find the next ‘big thing’ in whatever corner of the world they may be plying their trade. On top of that, the appointment of the experienced Marcel Bout as the Head of Global Scouting could well be an excellent move.

However, this is merely 18 months of good work. And it’s not something that will pay immediate dividends. In fact it’s far too soon to judge whether any of it is good at all. It could be argued too that it wouldn’t have taken a footballing genius to walk into Newcastle United and see that we needed more staff in all areas. Mike Ashley’s neglect in these areas has been well documented with the phrase ‘skeleton staff’ being used regularly to describe the whole operation and the phrase ‘Lee Charnley’ often shorthand for skeleton staff.

I don’t feel particularly qualified to accurately judge Ashworth’s work. I’m an English teacher and a football fan; what do I know about the quality of a sporting director’s work? What I do know is agreeing to join the club, talking of your role as a ‘long term project’ and then bailing on said project after 18 months when some friends come calling doesn’t seem particularly professional.

Delve deeper into Ashworth’s actions and it’s easy to start asking questions. I’ve read a lot about his ambition to align the scouting, analysis and medical departments in order to bring success. But the minute we mention the medical department it’s easy to start picking holes in what Ashworth has brought to the club. The Head Physio, Danny Murphy recently left the club and when we look at the amount of injuries and time lost to them at the club this season it’s hard not to put two and two together! A recent report said we’d lost 691 minutes to injury this season. Now, I know that’s not the fault of Dan Ashworth, but he’s the person who’s overseen the appointments of staff.

If we look at the signings that our sporting director has had a hand in, then it could be argued that more cracks appear. The most obvious problem comes with the transfer of Sandro Tonali and his subsequent ban for gambling. I realise that this could never be as cut and dried as we’d like it to be and that Ashworth cannot solely be blamed. Again though, the due diligence and background checks are all his responsibility. And even with the secretive nature of addiction, the fact that it all remained hidden from Ashworth doesn’t look good. I mean, we’re told about his contacts, his research, his analysis etc and yet this was allowed to happen. The buck has to stop somewhere.

Garang Kuol is another signing who has flattered to deceive and another signed on Ashworth’s watch. Yet to make an appearance in black and white, Kuol has been loaned out to Hearts, where he made 8 appearances and then Volendaam in Holland where he’s made 10. While the lad may have all the potential in the world and may even come good at Newcastle eventually, he’s yet to pull up any trees and his lack of progress looks sightly worrying.

Add to these names the likes of Lewis Hall, Jordan Hackett and Harrison Ashby and you might start to wonder about Ashworth’s judgement.

So what of the future without Dan Ashworth? Well, it’s safe to say that Brighton haven’t exactly suffered since he left. In fact, David Weir, the man who replaced Ashworth has gone on to make some excellent signings including Simon Adingra, Facundo Bounanotte – both of whom started in the recent win at Sheff Utd – and Joao Pedro who we failed to sign and has scored 19 goals already this season. Brighton also currently sit one place ahead of us in the table.

Given the size of the project that our owners have planned at Newcastle, it would be a surprise if there wasn’t a whole host of willing takers for the job. Gone are the days of appointing the likes of Joe Kinnear and we should be able to look forward to a top notch replacement. Names have been mentioned, but I’d be lying if I listed them and pretended to be impressed, as I know little or nothing about their work! But I’ll look forward to seeing who it is that we aim for.

Asides from this, our scouting department will have targets lined up, so it’s not as if losing Ashworth will mean that we can’t attract players. Work will have been ongoing for a long time and it’s been interesting to read reports about the fact that Ashworth’s access to our reports and plans has been rescinded while he’s been placed on ‘gardening leave’. It seems only right though.

In terms of the move, it would be wrong of me to say that I can’t see the attraction. Manchester United are one of the biggest clubs in the world and however you view their record over the last decade or so, they remain an attractive proposition for many in the world of football. Just ask their many fans from all corners of the globe! But their commercial activity and revenue is well documented and being at a club who aren’t as impaired by FFP/SPR would undoubtedly have its benefits.

In reality though, Manchester United are still a bit of a mess and it’ll be interesting to see just how much Sir Jim Radcliffe can get away with before the Glazers stick their collective oars in. The self styled biggest club in the world are currently 6th in the league and Champions League football is certainly not assured for next year. And with Ashworth calling the shots, will the fans settle for the sort of signings that on first viewing may not have them licking their lips in anticipation? After all, they’re a club who love a big name and all its associated glamour.

In the meantime, Ashworth finds himself on gardening leave once again, with his loyalty, ego and even his ability being questioned in some quarters. I keep reading about his successes elsewhere, but perhaps what’s happened at Newcastle might suggest that his powers are on the wane? Maybe, in the same way that all good managers have their time, he’s actually yesterday’s man. And maybe this paves the way for a real forward thinking appointment. The terms of his departure will be hugely important for Newcastle and it’s imperative that we get the best deal possible for the club.

I was delighted to read talk of us demanding £15 million in compensation as well as insisting on a long period of gardening leave. We cannot afford to roll over and submit to whatever demands are made of us. Written assurances need to be forthcoming about any further movement between the clubs and access to our transfer and scouting plans too. The hard work that has gone on over the past two years can’t just be undone because one man has moved on and thinks he can cherry pick whatever he wants at our club.

If Manchester United want Dan Ashworth so badly, then they should be made to pay the going rate. Given his statements about our club and fans in the past, perhaps Rio Ferdinand could chip in?

In the meantime, let’s hope that this latest development is simply a bump in the road and that once the idea of paying for what you want kicks in, the deal can be done and Newcastle United can move on.

Gallowgate Cult Heroes: Number 5 Barry Venison

It’s still quite rare for a player to cross the divide between black and white and red and white. In my lifetime there haven’t been that many and even if we go right back in time, a player who played for both is usually rare enough to grab a bit of attention. However, it’s even more rare for one of these moves to be deemed a success. Just ask Lee Clark or Michael Chopra!

Arguably one of the biggest successes in playing for both Newcastle and Sunderland would be Barry Venison who was adored during his time at both clubs.

Venison arrived at Newcastle from Liverpool in a £295,000 deal. We were in the second tier of English football, having just escaped relegation to Division 3 at the end of the previous season under Kevin Keegan. King Kev was now assembling a squad for a promotion challenge, with the Premiership (now the Premier League) only a year old. Venners would become a key component in that Championship winning season.

Barry had, of course, started his career at Sunderland in 1981. He would become their captain at just age 20, eventually playing a total of 205 times and becoming the youngest player to captain a side at Wembley when our lovely neighbours lost the 1985 Milk Cup. He would leave for the all conquering Liverpool side of the 80s in 1986 in a £200,000 deal and stay there for 6 years before he joined us.

Venison brought much needed big game experience and guile to a squad that, while it was being overhauled, still contained many of the squad from the previous almost disastrous campaign. The likes of Lee Clark, Robbie Elliot and Steve Howey would learn a lot from Venners and his influence would be felt by incoming future superstars like Rob Lee and Andy Cole too. So while Brian Kilcline would start the season as captain, Venison was very much the power behind the throne and would eventually take the captaincy when Killer was out of the side. A latter day Kieran Trippier, if you will. Just with bigger hair.

Undoubtedly, part of Venison’s appeal was his sense of ‘style’. He was no ordinary everyday footballer with his long, flowing blonde locks and unique fashion sense. He was the closest thing we’d get to Miami Vice on Tyneside and some of his choices were legendary. He embraced bleached bootcut jeans and at times even paired them with cowboy boots, while on his wedding day he wore a pink suit, looking every inch the Don Johnson lookalike and outshining his bride at the same time!

A tough tackling, hard running overlapping right back he quickly became a firm favourite with our fans. And although he would only ever score one goal for the club, he was always at the front of the queue when celebrating other people’s goals. Barry simply loved the celebrations and could regularly be found piling in on top of those shaking their fists at the crowd!

After winning the Division One championship, Venners continued as a regular at right back in the team that brought European football back to St. James’ Park for the ’94/95 season. However, that would be the season where his partying pushed one too many of Keegan’s buttons and he was stripped of the captaincy. He would also lose his spot in the team at right back after Marc Hottiger was brought in.

However, Venison was then reborn, converted to a holding midfielder by Keegan. He took to the position like a duck to water as well and was called up by England in the same season.

Barry Venison was what we might call a character. Someone who threw himself into life as a footballer and who – in terms of the modern day footballer – it could be argued, very much made the most of his slightly limited ability. He would move on to Galatasaray at the end of the ’94/’95 season but would live long in the memory of many a Mag. A cross between some kind of catalogue model and a slightly effeminate Viking, Barry more than successfully crossed the divide and his red and white background was never held against him.

NUFC – We can’t do right for doing wrong?

Newcastle United fans, eh? What are we like? With our bloody flags, our songs and our attempts to support our team and help them to win football matches. But that’s not all. What about the club and the team? Buying success, celebrating goals and wins and inventing ‘shithousery’ being the tip of the iceberg. Who do we think we are, eh?

Having supported Newcastle United for over 40 years, I can’t say that we’ve always been popular. The Keegan years aside when we were everyone’s second team, apparently, someone’s always had a problem with Newcastle United. Oddly enough, that problem has grown exponentially over the last two years…I can’t think why.

Do I care what fans of other clubs think? No, of course not. I’m very much with Eddie Howe on this one; we’re not here to be popular, we’re here to compete.

That said, I do find the amount of complaints about us and the amount of moaning from other fans, really, really funny. So, I thought I’d go through a few things that spring to mind, especially as the attention on us seems to have ramped up significantly this season.

Eddie Howe is the master protagonist in all of this. As soon as he joined the club in November 2021, he set about winding up fans of other clubs. And how did he do it? The Lap of Appreciation. Win, lose or draw, our team and staff would stay on the pitch and walk round clapping. Clapping! I mean, straight away you can see how that would irk fans of other clubs. Who does he think he is getting 30 odd men and women to amble round a load of grass clapping at folk? God forbid, if I supported anyone else I’d be understandably livid at all that clapping!

The main problem here, according to fans of other clubs is that we haven’t won a trophy. So, of course we’re not allowed to celebrate anything, ever. In fact it’s possible that within a few months the Premier League will ask clubs to vote on whether clubs in black and white stripes can celebrate goals. Maybe, we can even expect a subsection about getting excited or something like that. That’s before we even get onto the crowd roaring at a tackle being made or a player enjoying the same, which has a seismic influence on the mood of other fans. More evidence of what a small club we are, apparently…

The point in all of this – and I truly hope we all got the sarcasm – is that it’s absolutely ridiculous and more than just a little bit pathetic. Two years of whingeing, moaning, bleating on and the crying of gallons of salty tears and all because what was once dubbed ‘a wee club in the north’ are challenging the status quo again. But the ridiculousness doesn’t stop there.

Probably most famously, Eddie then brought in the celebration photo. That’s right, a photo of people celebrating! So, when we win a match the whole squad, staff and even injured players have a photo in the dressing room. Personally, I love it. It’s a brilliant illustration of the spirit and the togetherness in the squad and coming after watching teams with fractured dressing rooms and very little spirit for years and years, it’s a welcome addition to the way we do things.

Other fans loathe that photo, which is hilarious! When we’ve won, social media is just a wonderful illustration of how much we’ve upset what some fans see as being the natural order of things. And of course, it was even funnier when Jason Tindall organised the squad and staff into formation in front of the away fans at the end of our derby win at the Stadium of Shite recently. The irony of being told that we showed a lack of respect is amazing, given the neanderthal taunts of the opposition over the years!

The re-birth of Wor Flags was something else that got on the nerves of non Mags. While it only requires possession of a pair of functioning eyes to admire the sheer brilliance of some of the displays, apparently if you don’t support Newcastle, they’re anything from ‘pathetic’ to ’embarrassing’. Not as embarrassing as the 17 grand Tunnocks appreciation display that we were subjected to at the weekend, mind. But again, we’re in the wrong for supporting our team, especially if you believe the old opposition fan favourite that it’s all funded by the Saudis anyway, which is obviously bollocks. But why let the truth get in the way of your salty tears and another ridiculous conspiracy theory?

As well as that we’ve also invented something called ‘shithousery’. Previously known as ‘game management’ when certain other clubs did it, it’s been rebranded seemingly because we did it better. Fans of Premier League clubs have been up in arms in stadiums, online and on radio talk ins about how we’re ruining the game with our two balls on the pitch shenanigans and conveniently faked injuries. And the mention of Jason Tindall is like a red rag to a bull!

It’s been amusing to watch the sheer amount of people tearing their hair out over the last couple of years and it’s particularly hilarious to watch the complaints from the so called ‘Big 6’. They really don’t like any attempt to level the playing field, do they?

One of the funniest things I’ve read from opposition fans though, is the one about 5.30 kick offs on a Saturday night. If you haven’t heard it, you’ll love it. The conspiracy theory goes that we get given this kick off time ‘every week’ meaning that we’re on TV. And of course, the reason for that is because it’s prime time in Saudi Arabia, meaning that our legions of fans out there and more appropriately, our ownership can watch the games. This is of course because our owners are bribing Sky…

The mind boggles! No thought to the fact that it actually puts our travelling support out, just a blind belief that kicking off at 5.30 on a Saturday somehow gives us an ill gotten advantage. Once again, it’s good to see we’re at the forefront of so many people’s minds, even if literally none of it makes any sense whatsoever. God forbid that our fans sing and cheers the lads on at those games. And Heaven help anyone who brings a bloody flag!

And then we had the sheer temerity to qualify for a place in the Champions League. Again, there was outrage. The Champions League, it seems was a closed shop where only the clubs who wanted to leave it and the Premier League to form their own EuroMegaSuperDoopa league were allowed to play and make money from. A strange logic, but one that we should have accepted, apparently. Thus, the fume was very much real when poor old Liverpool could only finish in 5th and super club Spurs only just made the top 10.

And so, when the Champions League draw was made and we ended up in our ‘Group of Death’ it must’ve felt like Christmas morning in certain parts of the country! The come down after we hammered PSG on the second matchday would have really, really hurt though! Apparently, us being in the competition was futile and our place would have been much better filled by a ‘big club’. Well, it’s hard to see how any of those ‘big clubs’ other than Man City would have coped a great deal better in the group we’ve got. And the fact that we were still in with a chance of qualifying for the next stage of the competition until the last seconds of the group stage is huge and it’s the kind of thing that would have been eating away at fans of certain clubs. It’s been borne out by the reaction to us going out of the competition. It’s funny how we matter so much!

The last moan, and one of the funniest, is the one that seems to suggest that we’ve found a way to influence the PGMOL and VAR officials. It’s an idea that’s been floated more or less every time we’ve got a decision, but the home game against Arsenal caused a little bit of a stir to say the least. I won’t go too far into it, but our winning goal was checked, checked and checked again and still ruled legitimate. They even reviewed the whole thing independently a couple of days later and it was still a goal.

None of this stopped the crying though, with yet more allegations about our owners having some mysterious influence over officials. Mikel Arteta also went into meltdown not once but twice which was pretty hysterical. I must admit, this didn’t really bother me. I could kind of see the point. If that goal had been given against us, I’d have questioned it as well. I wouldn’t have blamed Arsenal’s ownership or fans though. Sadly, they’re probably still banging on about it even as I type.

So what happened next – 4 weeks on from that game and goal – was pretty funny, really. And predictable, I suppose. When we were on the the wrong end of a VAR shocker with the PSG penalty there was more vitriol, desperation and petty jealousy. The word that seemed to be most prevalent on social media was karma. Now karma is a concept I have a bit of belief in, as it goes. But the next morning, when the assistant VAR who recommended that the ref go to the screen was stood down from his next game and then UEFA clarified and updated the handball rule, it was just obvious that it had been a shocking decision against us. Less karma, more drama it seemed.

It’s been a funny old couple of years as a Toon fan. No one likes us, but as the song goes, we don’t care. This was always going to be the way. Having been bought by an organisation worth hundreds of billions, the green eyed monster was bound to surface at some point. It was probably just a bit quicker than any of us might have expected and definitely from lots of unexpected fanbases. I mean, Crystal Palace? Who knew they were such human rights activists? And let’s not get started on our friends down the road and their sudden penchant for shouting about blood on people’s hands.

For such a ‘small club’, we’ve come a long way in a very short space of time, eh?

Gallowgate Cult Heroes; Number 4 Micky Quinn

If you’re a Newcastle United fan, it’s almost certain that you’ll love a number 9. We’ve been brought up on them. For the older generation, we would have been told stories of Jackie Milburn, Hughie Gallagher and Len White. Some of us might even have been lucky enough to watch the great Supermac in the 70s. The younger generation could point to the brilliance of the likes of Cole, Ferdinand, Shearer and even Callum Wilson.

No one can argue that we’ve had a glut of quality strikers to have idolised over the years. Even when you move away from the obvious, you’ll still find some excellent strikers who’ve left their mark on Tyneside. Micky Quinn is definitely one of those names and to this day holds cult status in Newcastle.

Quinn was signed from Portsmouth at a turbulent time for the club. Arriving in July 1989 for £680,000, he was joining a fractured club. Many supporters were boycotting the club and protesting against the board of the time which was led by one of the most unpopular chairmen of my lifetime in Gordon McKeag. So while Quinn jumped at the chance to join the Toon, he certainly wasn’t popular from the off. Quinn himself famously tells a story of seeing the protests as he walked through the city and bearing witness to a banner that asked ‘Who the f**k is Mick Quinn?’

I was well aware of who he was as the kind of geeky kid who always kept track of the top scorers in every division, so Quinny’s signing excited me and was a rare piece of good news at a time when I could feel myself drifting away from the club and its under-ambitious ownership. As well as being a Bob Carolgees lookalike, Quinny was known for being a little on the larger side and in truth wasn’t the perfect physical specimen, but as he’d say later on in his career, he was the fastest you’d find over the first yard!

My cousin was part of the supporter boycott and I was torn between getting a ticket for the first game of the season or standing outside St. James’ Park like he did and trying to persuade people to stay away and put pressure on the board. Thankfully, I went in that day.

Quinny’s debut is the stuff of modern NUFC folklore. In front of just over 24,000 fans, he scored four goals in a 5-2 win against promotion favourites Leeds United. By the end of the game, no one was asking who he was anymore and Quinny quickly became a crowd favourite. Having stood watching the likes of Frank Pingel, Mirandinha and Rob Macdonald struggle to score goals in the previous season, I was thrilled that we had such a number 9 as Micky Quinn and for many others he would become a hero just based on that game alone.

Quinny scored 34 goals in that first season, cementing his place in the history of the club and also in the hearts of many a supporter of a certain age. After 4 on debut he then went on to score in each of the next 4 games and he simply kept on scoring all season. His record for that season – 34 in 53 games has him in 5th place for the most goals scored in a season at NUFC. I was 18 at the time and the partnership between Quinny and Mark McGhee that season remains one of my favourites of all time.

In his second season Quinny scored 20 goals, but the team finished 11th in the old 2nd division and the writing was on the wall for manager Ossie Ardiles. The season that followed was the now infamous and almost disastrous one that ended with Kevin Keegan coming in as manager and somehow managing to save us from the drop. Quinn scored 10 that year but was eclipsed by midfielder Gavin Peacock who got 21 and it would become obvious that the manager didn’t really fancy our cult hero.

During that amazing first season in ’89-’90 I was lucky enough to meet Micky. He was part of a group of Newcastle players who were taking part in a charity cricket match at a local cricket club in Swalwell. Me and a couple of mates went along and skulked around on the boundary, waiting to try and grab a word with our heroes. I was 17 and still very much in awe of these people who I watched week in week out.

Having managed to get an autograph from Kevin Brock, we waited and waited for Quinny and when he was fielding right by the rope we grabbed our opportunity. He signed my old green and yellow striped away top and was just a genuinely nice bloke. He’d taken a flying catch moments before and was full of himself, as you would be!

Another, rather different memory of Quinny would be from a couple of seasons later and the 91-92 season. It was away at Sunderland and the infamous Liam O’Brien over the wall game. Quinny was actually injured and on crutches at the time but I have a vivid memory of him approaching the way fans in the Roker End at the end of the game, wildly waving his crutches around and celebrating. We’d had a few crucial injuries going into the game and so the draw was actually a great result and Micky, like the whole away end, was ecstatic. He knew just what the club meant to the fans!

To those of us who followed Newcastle United around the country in the late 80s and early 90s, Mick Quinn was a legend. When he wasn’t banging in the goals he could invariably be found ‘de-stressing’ in the local nightclubs and was a big fan of the Tuxedo Princess! A lot of that side of things is detailed in his excellent autobiography ‘Who At All The Pies’, which is a must read if Quinny is a new name to you.

In all, Quinny scored 63 goals in 126 appearances for the club and always gave everything. He embraced the weight of that number 9 shirt and did it proud, starting with that incredible debut. He was eventually sold to Coventry City where he would go on to gain cult hero status with their fans too. Newcastle United moved on in style when he was sold, with Kevin Keegan bringing in Andy Cole as we gained promotion. A lot of us fans will never forget Micky Quinn though!

Gallowgate Cult Heroes; Number 2 Brian Kilcline

Signing a player who’s better known as ‘Killer’ sounds like the kind of thing you’d only experience via the pages of a 1970s comic. And in many ways, Brian ‘Killer’ Kilcline’s story would go on to feel like pure fiction.

Brian Kilcline was Kevin Keegan’s first signing in his first spell as Newcastle manager. A typical Keegan singing? No, but in many ways Killer was one of the most important signings the club ever made. He gave a team, that had previously cowered at the first scent of a problem, a spine and was one of the major reasons that the club avoided relegation in the season that he joined. Make no doubt about it, Newcastle United were in deep trouble and in grave danger of tumbling into Division 3 (League One now). Brian Kilcline was Keegan’s first port of call in order to make sure that didn’t happen.

Signed from Oldham in 1992, Kilcline was immediately made club captain. Having previously captained Coventry to an FA Cup win in 1987, he had valuable experience to add to a dressing room that was a mixture of underachieving journeymen and raw kids. Killer was 29 when he signed and was charged with the business of giving the squad a sense of belief as well as a metaphorical kick up the backside. At the time our squad included such luminaries as Ray Ranson, Mark Stimson, Peter Garland and Archie Gourlay, but previous manager, Ossie Ardiles, had put all his faith in youth and players such as Lee Clark, Steve Watson, Lee Makel and Robbie Elliot. While we were playing some pretty football, we just weren’t winning games and were sinking fast. I remember week in, week out having that sinking feeling that we couldn’t possibly survive. Then, along came Keegan and Killer!

Brian made his Newcastle debut in a 1-1 home draw against Barnsley, replacing Darren Bradshaw in the starting line up after the team were beaten 3-1 away at Blackburn. Newcastle were stuck in 22nd place in the division at this point. Seven days later, with Killer again in the side, we recorded a 0-1 away victory at Port Vale and moved up to 19th.

From there we’d go on picking up points so that by the time we’d beaten Sunderland 1-0 at home at the end of March we were sitting in 17th place and looking far more comfortable with Killer marshalling the defence.

However, 5 successive defeats followed, with Kilcline sidelined through injury for three of them and Newcastle plunged back into trouble.

Ultimately, the side did enough to stay up with successive victories against Portsmouth and Leicester and Kilcline’s place in history was already assured. Those two games will go down in club history and while the home game v Pompey will always be associated with David Kelly’s late winner, it was Killer’s defence that kept a rare clean sheet that day. Similarly, the game away at Leicester will be remembered mainly for the performances of players like Kelly, again, and Gavin Peacock, as well as a pitch invasion by home fans, but Killer’s influence that day cannot be underestimated as Newcastle held their nerve enough to get over the line in one of the most dramatic games I’ve even witnessed as a Newcastle fan. Forget winning games in the Champions League, this was like the Alamo (it was a battle, look it up, kids).

While Killer will be remembered as the man who Keegan trusted to guide the club to safety during one of the darkest periods in its history, it shouldn’t be forgotten that the very next season he captained the team to promotion. Keegan famously referred to him as “the most important signing I ever made for the club” and instantly secured Killer’s status as a true legend for Newcastle United. However, he was to start only one game for us in the Premier League and moved on to Swindon soon after. There, Killer made 10 appearances in the Premier League, but left for Mansfield Town in 1995 amid suggestions of a falling out with the Swindon manager Steve McMahon.

Later in his career Killer began to explore his more imaginative side, living for a while on a narrow boat, before spending his time travelling the world with wife Lynn once he’d retired. Nowadays, Brian lives in rural Holmfirth in Yorkshire where he spends time managing rental properties and renovating houses. In the recent past he has still turned out for Newcastle legends teams too.

Although he only spent a short amount of time on Tyneside, Killer was undoubtedly a hero for Newcastle. Not only did he help to save the club from a disastrous relegation to League 1, but he led the side to the promised land of the Premier League a year later too. In doing so he had a huge influence, not just on the future of the club itself, but also on a group of young players such as Lee Clark, Steve Watson, Robbie Elliot and Allan Nielson, players who would go on to have a bright future with the club.

Brian Kilcline; looked like a Viking, played with grit, passion and determination, led like a legend.

NUFC: Dan Ashworth and the changing face of the academy.

Some months ago, I wrote an article about the state of the Newcastle United academy. It was largely a tale of failure over the years and of neglect, particularly during Mike Ashley’s tenure, with gambling on talent released by other clubs or kids being brought in from non league to compliment the local talent. In short, the academy hadn’t been working, with only a handful of first team players of any quality emerging over the course of far too many years.

However, like Gary Barlow and his band of oiled up and oddly dressed mates once sung, ‘everything changes’ and in the case of our academy there’s now more than a hint of hope again.

So how have things changed then? Well, it would appear to be down to the masterplan of one man; Dan Ashworth, who seems driven to rebuilding our club from the bottom up. And thus, the whole approach to investment in our younger years has begun to take on a bit of a transformation.

As a fan, it’s nice to feel like there’s a plan. As someone who’s followed the club since the late 70s, ever since I was able to understand the concept of youth teams, our system has never felt like it’s the work of a professional football club and we’ve lagged behind names as wide and varied as Manchester United, Liverpool, Crewe Alexandra and even Sunderland. While others have appeared to have had some kind of conveyor belt producing first team ready players, we’ve been metaphorically hunting down the back of the sofa for small change. For every Gazza type of success, there have been dozens of young players released from the club. If anything, it’s felt like a fluke when a young player has actually come through to the first team.

Our new plan appears to be effective in its simplicity. We’re scouting the best young players in all age groups from various countries and attempting to bring them to the club. We’re investing money. I mean, you’d have imagined someone might have thought of it before now, really. Of course, it’s a wider net than just that, but it’s still simple all the same.

It’s the picture closer to home that really interests me though as it seems like we’re delving down the age groups and attempting to cherry pick the best talent from the home nations too. However, where before we seemed to be happy just to take a chance on kids who’d been released from other Premier League clubs – Charlie Wiggett, Rosaire Longelo and Remi Savage spring to mind – now we’re upping our game somewhat.

In the recent past, under Ashley, we did take the odd chance on youth. But it was never an expensive or risky gamble. The signing of Regan Thomson is a case in point as we paid £60k to Queens Park to bring the highly rated 16-year-old to St. James’ in 2020, beating Celtic and Rangers to his signature and then failed to develop his talents. Thomson was released in summer 2022 and as of June this year has been without a club having left East Kilbride back in Scotland. I must confess, I’d forgotten all about him. Similarly, Jake Turner was taken from Bolton after they’d gone into administration but didn’t make the grade here, although he is playing league football with Gillingham now.

Under Dan Ashworth’s guidance lots changed in the youth ranks. While we still have a fair number of local lads battling to follow in the footsteps of Sean Longstaff and Paul Dummett, the focus feels like it’s shifted somewhat and moved up a gear, if you like. The shift began with the signing of Garang Kuol last year, but the pace has stepped up even more since then.

This summer saw Newcastle bring in several highly rated youngsters from various domestic clubs. And we’ve started young too! Firstly, there was a compensation fee paid to Port Vale for 14-year-old midfielder Michael Mills. Then, we shelled out a reported 5 figure fee for 16-year-old striker Kacey Wooster from Southend’s academy.

After that we’ve also signed up a number of highly rated young players for the Academy and Under 21 sides, both of which have underperformed for years. England Under 17 internationals Leo Shahar from Wolves and Travon Sanusi from Birmingham have come in and seem to have made an immediate impact. On top of that we’ve also signed 17-year-old midfielder Travis Hernes from Shrewsbury, a kid who’d already made first team appearances for the League One Shrews.

But the investment in youth didn’t stop on these shores. Of course, we signed Yankuba Minteh (19) from Odense, a player who already look first team ready with his loan exploits at Feyenoord. Add to that the signing of Cathal Heffernan from AC Milan and it’s clear that we’re intent on making our youth set up far more competitive than ever.

Obviously, when investing in youth there’s never a guarantee of success. Year in, year out for instance, there seems to be a ‘highly rated’ striker in the academy set up and yet a breakthrough to the first team is rare. Even Andy Carroll had been played at left back for much of his youth career with the club. In recent years Elias Sorensen, Tom Allan and Tom Heardman were all touted for success after Carroll, but none was able to make the step up.

I’ll confess to knowing little of our new arrivals. Obviously though, Minteh looks to be a real find. I actually watched Hernes play for Shrewsbury against Leeds, but couldn’t say I noticed anything special that night. After that, I’m guessing. Experience tells me that someone with Heffernan’s background might well be a good bet for the first team in the future. And Travon Sanusi comes with a glowing reputation. As for the rest, who knows? Luckily though, the scouting network has been vastly improved in the two years since the takeover and in Dan Ashworth we have someone with a track record that we can trust.

You can be sure that the additions at youth level will continue through the season and year after year from then too. At the time we signed Heffernan there was also a lot of talk about signing his international team mate Kevin Zefi from Inter too. It didn’t come to fruition, but I’d be surprised if moves aren’t still being made. And with scouts working hard across the world, there will be other targets being constantly monitored too.

The professional approach to youth team football is a refreshing change of direction for the club. Newcastle United are now establishing themselves as an attractive proposition and you can be sure that will catch the eye of many talented youngsters who end up with their choice of clubs. With Ashworth at the helm it feels like we can rest assured that we’re now a totally viable option and that hopefully we’ll be regularly producing first team regulars from within our own ranks.

These are much needed exciting times for our academy set up. The future’s bright. The future’s black and white and it appears to be in very good hands!

Gallowgate Cult Heroes – Number 1; John Burridge.

There’s an old saying that always gets trotted out when talking about what we’ll politely call ‘journeymen’ footballers. You know the one, ‘more clubs than Jack Nicklaus’. Funny eh? See what they did there? Anyway, the first player I’m going to look at kind of sums up exactly why that old saying exists as he had more clubs than the pro shop at St. Andrews, let alone Jack Nicklaus! My first Gallowgate Cult Hero is goalkeeper John Burridge.

Universally known as ‘Budgie’, John Burridge signed for Newcastle from Southampton in July 1989, leaving almost 2 years later. To this day, he remains the only player I’ve ever turned up specifically early to watch warm up! But more of that later.

Burridge started his league career with Workington Town in 1969, when they were still a league club, before moving on to Blackpool a couple of years later. He then moved around a lot of clubs including, Aston Villa, Crystal Palace, QPR, Wolves and Sheffield United. By the time he’d signed for us he was 38 years old and had been playing for 20 years and had 10 clubs. Newcastle were in the old 2nd division or the Championship, as it’s now known and Burridge had come in alongside other new signings like Micky Quinn and Mark McGhee. Hopes were high for a possible promotion campaign.

Hopes, however, were ultimately dashed and having failed to gain automatic promotion Newcastle famously crashed out in the semi finals of the play offs to the old enemy, Sunderland. In the first leg of the semi, we played away at the old Roker Park and Burridge had his finest cult hero moments in black and white, diving down to his right to save a late Paul Hardyman penalty. But the drama didn’t end there as Hardyman then ran to where Budgie was lying, clutching the ball, and kicked him square in the head! He was immediately sent off, but Budgie was rightly raging!

Despite skiving school and standing in a very early morning queue, I remember that I couldn’t get tickets for that away leg – you see, ticketing isn’t just a modern day problem! However, we managed to get tickets for a beam back of the game at Whitley Bay Ice Rink of all places. In the hysteria following Budgie’s save, I missed the kick in the head entirely and remember just being delighted at the sending off, but completely in the dark as to why Budgie looked like he wanted to kill someone!

Burridge was a maker of spectacular saves, starting with one in the first minute of his debut against Reading when flew across the goal to tip an early header over the bar. So, a good shot stopper in today’s language. He possessed a confidence like no Newcastle goalkeeper I’d seen before too. But with that confidence came many rushes of blood to the head and while Burridge was a keeper who liked to command his area, there were a few terrible errors in there too.

As I said earlier, I quite liked getting to home games early in Burridge’s time, just to watch his warm ups. I was 17 at the time and had never witnessed anything like it! Burridge, who described himself as “a clean living lad” was a big advocate of being in the best condition, fitness wise. If I remember rightly he practised yoga, which was something I hadn’t even heard of in those days! But his warm ups were something else. While others would just be pinging footballs around the place, Budgie would be like a contortionist, stretching himself into ever more painful looking positions, before walking on his hands, one armed push ups or doing something that just looked like he was dancing really, rather than warming up. Follow the link below and you’ll see what I mean. It’s from his Palace days, but he was still warming up in a similar fashion when he played for us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRulE9858eE

Speaking about his fitness and what was needed to play in goal, he once told a reporter, “You’re not a football player, you’re a handball gymnast”. He was a specialist goalkeeping coach at the time and was still making occasional appearances on the bench, despite being 43 by this time.

Another Budgie tale that sticks out for me was when the Toon visited Elland Road to play Leeds in that heartbreaking ’89-’90 season. Leeds would eventually go on to take the title, but we’d beaten them 5-2 on the opening game of the season, so the home team were determined to flex their muscles that day. To that end, as the Toon players walked into Elland Road legend has it that they were greeted by the sight and sound of Vinnie Jones screaming and bench pressing in a weird attempt to intimidate our boys. Budgie’s response was to add 10 kilos to each side of the weights and quickly do ten reps, before telling Jones, “That’s how you do it

By the time Kevin Keegan arrived as manager in 1992 Burridge had departed, heading to Scotland to play for Hibs. He briefly rejoined the club in 1994 as a back up keeper and goalkeeping coach, but despite declaring his loyalty to Keegan in typical Budgie fashion – “I would give the guy my eyes!” – he was soon on the move again.

In all, Burridge had 29 clubs, 19 of which were in the football league. He continued to be a colourful character wherever he went and still holds the record for being the oldest Premier League player of all time. He was 43 years and 162 days old when he played for Manchester City against QPR in May 1995. If my memory serves me rightly, he even played against us in that same season and had an absolute blinder, keeping a clean sheet. Later, whilst player manager of Blyth Spartans Budgie was convicted and fined for selling fake leisure wear and just last year, aged 70, he played in a friendly for Hibs. He even claimed not to be retired in a recent interview.

Perhaps the best Burridge story that I could find though, was the one where Budgie played a whole game for Wolves in a Superman outfit against us in the ’82-’83 season, after making a £100 bet with Kevin Keegan that he’d do it.

Clearly, Budgie was a one off and the type of character that has drifted out of the game in recent years, but it was always a pleasure to watch him play for Newcastle United!

Isaac Hayden; where did it all go wrong?

So Isaac Hayden has left the club for Standard Liege of all places. And while it might only be on loan for the season, it’s clear that his future lies elsewhere and that you possibly wouldn’t expect to see him in the black and white stripes again, even though his contract runs all the way through until June 2026.

Hayden joined Newcastle from Arsenal in July 2016 having spent the previous season on loan at Hull City in the Championship. His experience in the division would prove key to a newly relegated Newcastle team, who at the time were losing quite a few stars who weren’t so keen to drop down a division after we were relegated. He signed a five year contract and quickly became a favourite of both the fans and Rafa himself, who Hayden told one interviewer would wait for him in the car park in order to impart more advice on his game!

Isaac established himself as a defensive midfielder who wasn’t shy in the tackle, was physical, athletic, hard working but also had an eye for a pass. At a time when we were losing considerable talent in the midfield department with players such as Moussa Sisoko and Andros Townsend departing, Hayden felt like a bit of a godsend. As an established England Under 21 player and at a bargain £1.5m, it looked like Rafa had unearthed a gem!

Benitez flagged up Hayden as a player with real potential when he signed for the club and in that Championship winning season, he was a key performer. Making 38 appearances and scoring 2 goals, including a beauty away at Cardiff, Hayden had a strong first season, showing himself to be a leader in the team. In fact, he would make himself at home at the club over the next few years, despite some problems settling at first. It was to his credit though, he knuckled down and stayed and it was this type of determination that made him a bit of a fan favourite.

When Rafa left in 2019 and we ended up with Steve Bruce, even that wasn’t enough to force Hayden to leave! In fact, as he’d played under Bruce at Hull, Hayden continued to improve. In 2020 there would be another Toon highlight for Isaac when he scored a late winner with a header against Chelsea at the Gallowgate end; cue crazy scenes of unbridled joy around the ground!

By 2021 though, Isaac had picked up a serious injury and his Newcastle career wouldn’t ever be the same. When he wasn’t named in the Premier League squad for the second half of the 21/22 season, things looked pretty bleak. Consequently, in June 2022 Isaac joined Norwich on a season long loan, but injuries continued to dog his progress and he only managed 12 appearances.

For me, Hayden represents a bit of a puzzle. I rate him as a player and always enjoyed watching him play in black and white. I genuinely thought he had enough class to continue in the Premier League, but he never quite made his mark.

However, given his athleticism, intelligence and strength I’ve wondered if, given a break, he could have been a classic case of a player that was ripe for what we might refer to as a proper ‘Howeing’. If you look at what Eddie has done with players like Joelinton and Sean Longstaff, you could be forgiven for thinking that Hayden could have been another who would have benefitted from Howe’s coaching. Then again, perhaps Big Joe and Longstaff’s gains have just come at the expense of players like Isaac Hayden. And of course, there’s also the matter of fitness, which Hayden has struggled with for the past couple of seasons.

Furthermore, when you look at the standard of our midfield these days, it’s just very clear that we’ve moved on. So while Hayden was a player that many liked, I suppose we have to ask whether he’d get into our team, having been Howed or not. The short answer is probably no and exactly why he’s on the move. As good as Hayden was on his day, was he a Bruno, Longstaff, Tonali, Joelinton? Again, no and with younger players such as Anderson and Miley coming through, I guess it’s clear to see that Isaac Hayden just couldn’t stay.

Whatever has happened at Newcastle for Isaac Hayden, I think it’s a bit of a shame. However, as we all know only too well, this is a very different Newcastle United to the one that he joined back in 2016 and so there were always going to be casualties of such immense change.

Now 28, Hayden moves to Liege no longer a young player with potential. With almost 200 career appearances, the Belgians are getting an experienced player who could make a real difference to their season if he can stay fit. Let’s hope it works out for him.

Good luck for the rest of the season, Isaac.

‘We Are Newcastle United’; Episode 4 Where Our Lads Belong.

So, after a month worth of episodes, we get to the finale of ‘We Are Newcastle United’. And while we kind of know what happens – it was just last season and the Adidas deal got ‘leaked’ just the other week – it turns out that it’s still well worth a watch.

This one begins with archive footage of that Barcelona game from the Champions League and Tino’s hat-trick, which is timely given the recent Champions League draw. It’s obviously fantastic to watch back, but what occurred to me while I sat watching was what we beat Barca with. So, sure there was Tino, but alongside were the likes of John Dahl Tommason, Temuri Ketsbaia and a 44-year-old John Barnes. OK, that bit’s an exaggeration, but we also had Kenny Dalglish as manager, the bloke responsible for some of the most mind-numbing football I’ve ever watched. Given those facts, maybe our group this year isn’t that ‘deathly’ after all.

As preparations are made for another game, we find ourselves in the posh seats watching the build up to dinner time. As NUFC scran’s version of Eddie Howe reads out the menu, a waitress confesses that she doesn’t know what gazpacho is. Expecting the announcement of a new signing and possible even another twist in the Santiago Munez/Goal saga I shuffled to the edge of my seat only to be deflated almost instantly by the revelation that it is in fact just “cold soup”. Talk about an anti-climax.

Watching the Southampton game again was a strange experience and I sat there feeling just as sick as I did at the time, even though I knew the ending! Amanda Staveley features here too and reveals herself again to be very much a fan, whatever you might think about the PR side of this series. She’s up and down in her seat like a jack-in-the-box and as we watch her at half time it seems she’s just like loads of us are while watching football. But she genuinely doesn’t know whether to watch the second half, feeling that she’ll jinx it, which is certainly akin to my own myriad of superstitions like half time toilet visits, lucky pants, lucky stones (don’t ask) and making sure that I follow the same routine in the build up to any game. Unlike me though, the minute she returns to the inside of the stadium, we score.

Later, we’re treated to another Zoom meeting of the club’s power brokers and not for the first time, it strikes me that the way they all speak feels like the exact antithesis of how it probably used to be. Their knowledge and passion seems clear, whereas a documentary a few seasons ago would have surely just shown Lee Charnley talking through a list of under 23 cast offs we’d taken on trial from other clubs while Mike Ashley sits swigging another can of Carling and picking Doritos crumbs off the front of his latest already grubby George at Asda white shirt. So, if nothing else, the documentary has served as an insight into just how professional the club is these days.

Tonight’s episode is particularly heartwarming with scenes of both Amanda Staveley and Eddie Howe with their kids and Dan Burn paying a visit to his home town and local football club for a Q&A with the youngsters there. All are shown as intense, driven, honest, but also good humoured and fun loving and come across really well. Kieran Trippier also features and when he talks you listen. Again, he’s intense, but what struck me about all four here was how calmly yet passionately they spoke about the club.

And then we’re taken on the journey that we’d all been waiting for. Staveley, Ghoudoussi, Eales et al are off on a seemingly top secret mission and if the broadcaster hadn’t have messed this up a few weeks ago, you can only imagine the excitement at the big reveal. As it is, I’ve decided I’d quite like to work at Adidas HQ, despite the disappointment that their ‘World of Sport’ showed absolutely no sign of Dickie Davies or Big Daddy. But did you see the place? Incredible!

Mind you, despite sealing the biggest deal in the club’s history, I thought the board missed a trick. Now I’m no graduate of Harvard Business School, but I reckon if they’d all turned up clad head to toe in all manner of Adidas clobber and looking like Run DMC, they could well have squeezed a bit more money out of the deal. With that in mind, if anyone at Adidas – purveyors of the coolest trainers on the planet – or NUFC reads this, I’m available for hire. Or a free pair of trainers.

The series closes as we knew it would; with a happy ending. In the midst of it all there’s a shock as Amanda Staveley swears…then cries. Eddie Howe is as humble as ever. And fans and players enjoy one of the greatest nights in the club’s recent history. The message from all is clear: We are Newcastle United…and we might just have a few more happy endings planned too!

In almost closing myself , I do have a few daft observations about tonight’s episode and the series in general.

  1. Tonight, the voiceover has one fan telling us, “We will name our kids after these people”. Now, given my age that won’t be very likely. However, I’m hoping that my future grandchildren Joelinton, Wor Yasir, The Stave, Tripps and Big Dan Burn will take to their names like the champions I expect them to be and won’t get bullied at school.
  2. It was great to see Joe Willock lose himself in the euphoria of the Leicester City game and sing ‘Tell me ma, me ma’ like a fan, but I think he failed his X Factor audition.
  3. Could someone get Dan Ashworth a bigger chair, please?

4. As good as this series was, it would have been even better with 100% more Jacob Murphy.

I’ve enjoyed ‘We Are Newcastle United’ immensely. PR exercise or not, I’ve loved watching it and was glad that we never looked stupid or small time. It’s been reassuring to see how well the club seems to be run and that everyone involved cares. And it’s all been captured very well. At the end we were told that “Something exciting is going to happen”. I hope so, I really hope so!