Tag: soccer

NUFC: A time for heroes.

So Wednesday night came and went with a result that we couldn’t really argue with. Sure, the scoreline was painful and we’d competed well for three quarters of the tie. But I think we all knew – however deep down – that Barcelona away would spell the end of another European adventure.

As I write I’m not sure I’ve really fully recovered. It’s still bizarre to look at and there’s still a sense of disbelief about what happened. But a couple of days of reflection has told me that there was still stuff to be pleased about.

We had some more truly great European nights making the most progress we’ve ever made in the Champions League in the process. We matched the current Champions League holders – yawn, again – and despite the result, matched Barcelona for much of the tie. And when push comes to shove, we only lost 3 of 12 games. We’ll have learnt a huge amount from those 12 games and younger lads like Lewis Hall, Malick Thiaw, Lewis Miley and others will be better players for that experience. But the dust has to settle now.

As it stands, we’re about to launch ourselves into an eight game mini season, starting with the sister lovers down the road at home on Sunday. Six of the teams that we’ll play currently sit outside of the top 10, meaning that there are some very winnable games to come. Could there be a final fantastic twist in the season still to come?

Obviously though Sunday is huge. Whatever the status of either team, when we meet it’s always huge. And we really owe them one after the game in December. It wasn’t any kind of stylish win for them, just more the fact that we thoroughly let ourselves down. We just didn’t turn up and that cannot be the case on Sunday.

It would be great if all of the usual talk had some substance for once. Over the years I’ve gotten sick of hearing Newcastle players giving it the big one before big games and talking in cliches and soundbites about how ready we are and what we’re going to do. I’d hoped that the Carabao Cup final had put an end to any big game mentality issues. All I want on Sunday is that we turn up and are aggressive and absolutely on the front foot. Take the game to them, make sure there’s nowhere to hide and not a second to dwell on the ball and make sure that class tells in the end. We shouldn’t be giving an inch at St. James’.

Sunday isn’t about bragging rights or being ‘north east top dogs.’ Yes, it’s about pride, but it’s much more than that. Win and we kick start the season…again. Lose and the pressure’s on and frankly it’s a disaster. A win would make be psychologically massive as we attempt to climb the table, but because it’s them, it would undoubtedly do wonders for the club at this time. You might even argue that it sets up a feelgood factor going into next season too because a loss means that we’re starting from scratch when the same game comes around next year.

Every aspect is important, starting with the crowd. We have to make the atmosphere horrible, no excuses. Their lot need to be at the very least unnerved, while our lads need to be inspired. Win our battles, keep the ball, play fast and play 100% focused. If we’re being outbattled and outthought by Dan Bellend and Granit Xhaka then maybe a few need to be giving up. Given what’s just happened and what’s to come, we cannot lose. We just have to win.

Just this morning I watched a video of the highlights of the derby win on New Year’s Day, 1985. One of the first I can remember being at. We were superb that day, dominating, winning convincingly and seeing two mackems sent off for their headloss. We could do with seeing that spirit and that dominance this again weekend. A Peter Beardsley hat-trick wouldn’t go amiss either, but there’s no hope there! Perhaps Nick Woltemade is in the mood for revenge?

It’s crucial that we use all of the big game experience gained over the last four years, take the game to them and channel that aggression in order to keep eleven on the field. I for one couldn’t stand to see another referee ruin a game this season! And I couldn’t stand their lot and the media reminding us for another season of how long it is since we beat them in the league!

Last season, when the club needed a hero, eleven of them stepped up and left Wembley as “f***ing legends” to quote our captain. A year on and we need them to step up again, starting on Sunday and then carrying on for the seven games after. So let’s be positive about Sunday and then the rest of the season. We can only look up, in my opinion. No half measures, no mistakes, no excuses.

We’re Newcastle United. Howay the lads!

Magpie Moments Episode 7

Welcome to another edition of Magpie Moments. I’d like to think that this edition encapsulates the feeling that Newcastle United can be a very different kind of club. It’s not just glory and despair; no, we do a great line in the downright bizarre as well. But, we’ll start with a lovely goal just to remember that we are actually capable of a bit of unbridled joy as well!

Mark McGhee channelling Mexico ’86 Diego Maradona! It was October 1989 and Newcastle United were flying high near the top of the old Division 2 in the hunt for promotion. We’d started with a 5-2 thumping of promotion favourites Leeds, Micky Quinn getting four on debut and been reasonably consistent all season, sitting in 5th with what should have been a simple home game to come against Bradford. Newcastle being Newcastle though, nothing is ever straightforward and going into the final minute of the game, we’d huffed and puffed, missed a penalty and hit the post. Enter Mark McGhee who’d finally broke his scoring duck in late September and had scored in the previous 3 games. Taking the ball from a throw in McGhee held off his marker, future Toon centre half Peter Jackson, and eventually turned towards goal. Although not being blessed with any pace to speak of McGhee had momentum and simply barrelled his way past defenders, slaloming left and right until he was out in front of goal and able to slot the ball past the keeper. A simply brilliant goal! I was on the Gallowgate and the reaction was chaotic; sheer relief coupled with an instinctive need to stay on your feet while all around you pushed, shoved, jumped and hugged. Watching the goal again on YouTube I was amazed to hear commentator Roger Thames describe McGhee as “hurtling towards the danger zone”. He didn’t. In fact, it looked like he didn’t have the energy to celebrate when it went in, instead being dragged to the ground by Micky Quinn. The season would end woefully with the infamous play off defeat, but this was another moment where being a Toon fan is just the best thing in the world!

Jonas released. It takes a certain kind of boss to display a complete lack of sympathy, empathy or interest in an employee who has been diagnosed with cancer. And Mike Ashley was that certain kind of boss. So when Jonas Gutierrez was given his diagnosis of testicular cancer the club were slow to help. Then, when he returned after treatment it was felt that he was “a liability”. He wasn’t selected because his contract stipulated that a certain amount of appearances would trigger an extension. Hence the final day shenanigans and screaming up to the director’s box following his selection and goal against West Ham that year. But this wasn’t the biggest example of lacking any humanity here. No, that came when John Carver broke the news that Jonas was being released. By phone. When Jonas was on holiday. Yep, ‘Carvs’ – who was only following orders from above – rang Ryan Taylor to break news of his release and when it transpired that Jonas was there too, Carver simply asked Taylor to put him on! I mean, imagine that. “Hiya Jonas. Aye it’s John Carver. Good holiday so far? Tayls behaving himself? Why am I ringing? Oh, aye…well you know how you’ve been poorly and that? Well, Mike’s asked me to call, just out of courtesy like, to tell you that we’ll not be renewing your contract. We’re releasing you…hello? Jonas? Hello?” You stay class, Ashley.

The Indian War Cry. Readers of a certain vintage will know what this alludes to instantly. But lots of younger fans won’t have a clue. This was a ‘moment’ that used to happen every home game in the 80s. If memory serves me rightly, there was never a prompt or a traditional time for it, but during every match a bloke used to stand up in the corner of the East Stand nearest the Gallowgate and belt out an Indian war cry. There’s footage of it on YouTube and a bit of research tells me he was called Davy, but try as I might I could never locate his whereabouts from where I stood in the Scoreboard at the time. What can I say? It’s just another one of those moments that makes our club as mad as a box of frogs, as they say.

So there you have it. More weird and wonderful moments from over the years of supporting the Toon. And here’s to a few more next time!

NUFC: This might be a defining moment for all of us.

Like many others I watched the videos of Barcelona players arriving at Matfen Hall at the weekend with a mixture of trepidation and excitement. You can’t help but feel excited at the prospect of any Champions League tie, but this one is special for many reasons. This could well be the start of one of the most important periods in the history of the club.

Not to start inventing a rivalry, but we’ve been here before. This will be the sixth time we’ve faced Barca in the Champions League and while any game against them will bring back memories of September 1997 and Tino Asprilla, it shouldn’t be forgotten that this was the only time we’ve beaten them in the Champions League. It might just be time to start thinking about putting that right. So, as if we didn’t know already, the pressure’s on.

A win on Tuesday would be incredible, but sadly we can’t really trust in the logic that it would represent a turning point in out season. You only have to go back to the Man Utd home game to see that. The story of the season is that we can’t seem to string wins or performances together. But a win on Tuesday would surely prove something to the players. Even a draw would help.

Beating Barcelona would be monumental, but only for a short time. We mustn’t forget that it’s a two legged tie. So making the first leg competitive is essential. Having gone to the Etihad a few weeks back with little or no chance of a comeback we should have learned a lesson. Stay in the tie.

Heading to the Nou Camp for a dead rubber simply cannot happen (although I understand it could). So while we have problems with both injuries and form, the occasion and its importance should be enough for the players and staff. Eddie Howe needs to find the tactics that give us the edge and the players need to find the desire to win or at least stay in the game, which to be fair to them, they’ve managed in the Champions League this year.

There are several players who it could be said have something to prove. Nick Woltemade, while to me a player with real quality, seems to be the scapegoat for a lot of people at the moment. It’d be great to see him played further up the field and for him to grab a goal. Yoan Wissa has flattered to deceive since joining the club and is due a performance. And it would be fantastic to see Anthony Elanga use that pace and get at his full back, if he starts. Whoever does start and whoever enters the fray as a sub, this is a time for heroes.

As a team, this is about how we approach the challenges ahead. The ground will no doubt be a bear pit and yet nothing new for Barcelona’s players. The fans will undoubtedly do their part though. So, it’s very much over to Eddie and the players. Stay in the tie against Barcelona and then go on to Chelsea and try to do it all again. And then it’s a showdown with everything to play for at the Nou Camp. The stuff of dreams. Players, fans and staff have the experience and the know how to make this a successful week. Don’t get me wrong, beating Barcelona is a mammoth task and the odds are stacked against us, but surely it’s moments like this in life that we all live for? So why not throw everything you can at the task in hand?

Fellow fans, make it a bear pit, raise the roof and get right behind the lads. Then hopefully, the team can respond with something very special. And when all else fails just remember, it could be worse. We could be playing Port Vale!

Howay Eddie Howe’s Champions League lads!

The usual drama, but a much needed win!

As a Newcastle fan of almost 50 years I’ve gotten used to the fact that there will always be moments. Over the years there have been more bad moments than good ones, but after a while you get used to that and learn to savour the good ones even more.

Last night’s game was packed with moments and all the ups and downs of a pantomime, so isn’t it a shame that yet again one of the main ones was brought about by inept refereeing. But more of that later.

Our performance against Manchester United was the type that we had gotten used to during Eddie Howe’s tenure. High energy, committed, quick. However it was also the type of performance that we are seeing less and less of this season. Regardless, it was wonderful to watch, especially against that lot.

There were a lot of magnificent individual performances across the park. You could name every player and not be wrong. But some stood out more than others and it was nice to not just be praising Lewis Hall for once.

Kieran Trippier was magnificent. He’s been doubted all season; past it apparently, the legs have gone. Well last night he led like a legend, throwing himself into challenges, urging the lads on, making clearance after clearance and always keeping the ball safe with intelligent passing.

Dan Burn was peak Dan Burn. A captain without the armband, but also throwing in a few incredible 50 yard passes to switch the play across to Tripps. Arron Ramsdale, in for Nick Pope, was in fine form and kept us in the game when it could have slipped away.

In midfield, Joelinton rolled back the years with an all action display, driving us forward and breaking up opposition play with that familiar aggression that we’ve all come to love. Alongside him, Sandro Tonali was the midfield maestro from Milano once more.

It was fantastic to see that intensity can still be our identity and all the better for Will Osula’s crowning moment. Many of us would have settled for a draw at that point, but while Kieran Trippier possibly just saw an out ball and Dan Burn has admitted that he was screaming for Osula to take it to the corner, the man himself had other glorious ideas!

And what an idea it was!

However, for much of the final hour of the match many of us would have been preoccupied with Peter Bankes and the pantomime that he cobbled together alongside his pals from Manchester; the villain of the piece, making the rules up as he went along. A bizarre performance capped off by his inability to keep control or even time. Two yellows for Ramsey when you could argue that neither was worthy of a card. Yes, he went down, but firstly there was contact, secondly he just looked to have lost his footing and finally, he didn’t appeal in any way for a penalty. But I suppose when Man Utd are appealing for the sending off it’d be rude not to.

On several occasions Bankes failed to issue a card when Man Utd players waved imaginary yellows at him. And when Bruno Fernandes added telling him to f*** off twice later in the match, he ignored that too.

Next, he conveniently forgot how to tell the time, which when your watch is presumably digital is quite some feat! At the end of the first half Bankes basically played until our opposition scored. Maybe he forgot who their manager was.

In the end we overcame it all and 10 men or 12, 95 minutes or 99, the only numbers that mattered were those of the scoreline.

Mick Hucknall, Deirdre Barlow, Shaun and Bez, the little fella out of Take That…your boys took one helluva beating!

Newcastle well and truly United!

On the morning of the first leg of the Champions League play off in Azerbaijan you could be forgiven for thinking that Newcastle United were in crisis. If you were thick as two short planks that is. Never mind the truth, the media were having a right go at stirring things up.

In the days leading up to the tie there’d been numerous ‘stories’ concerning Toon players wanting to leave. Sandro Tonali was unhappy and wanted to go back to Italy, but Arsenal, Man Utd and Manchester City were ready to bid, so of course his departure was a formality. Anthony Gordon would be subject of a bid from Liverpool come summer. According to the BBC Nick Woltemade, was homesick and wanted to either go to Bayern Munich or just back to Stuttgart, despite a report that said anything but. And then of course Tino Livramento was off to Manchester City for…a bargain £40m.

Having had his tactics and future questioned for the last few weeks, we were then told that Spurs were coming in for Eddie Howe to replace Thomas Frank. So, of course this being a London club we’d be looking for a new manager come May, what with the capital’s glamour and how the streets are paved with gold.

Throw in the questioning of our summer transfer window, with Anthony Elanga and Jacob Ramsey both being labelled a colossal waste of money by some of the internet’s finest ‘Big 6’ fans and this was going to be a tricky tie.

And yet, we started like a train and were two up after 8 minutes and five up at half time having played brilliantly. It could and should have been more. What was a fluid, professional and lethal Newcastle attacking performance was somehow thwarted again and again by Qarabag keeper Mateusz Kochalski who was surely having the game of his life.

By the end, although we had conceded a consolation goal, we ended the game as 6-1 winners and had all but in name booked our place in the next round of the Champions League. Four goals for Anthony Gordon, some lovely stuff from Nick Woltemade, another goal for Malick Thiaw, a Dan Burn trivela assist, the return of Joelinton and a promising if brief debut for Sean Neave. Twenty two shots with 14 on target.

Six goals away from home in the Champions League. Regardless of who we were playing, not many teams have done that or will go on to do that. An excellent performance and a trip to remember for nearly two thousand of the best fans around.

Whatever the reports say, whatever way the media want to continually try and destabilise this club and however the ITKs want to earn their living, this was Newcastle United in name and in nature. A team running and fighting for each other. And all with smiling faces.

On to the quarter finals and bring on whoever it needs to be. Howay the lads!

NUFC in the Champions League – The alternative guide to Qarabag.

A long, long time ago in an internet galaxy far away…I used to write some stuff for a short lived NUFC fan site called The Pride of England (as in “Geordies are the…” an old, old song we sang back in the 80s & 90s). We were eager to provide something a little bit different in our approach to supporting the club and this meant that we looked at things in a bit of an irreverent style. And so it was a case of letting my imagination run wild…and making stuff up.

So, with irreverence, outright lies and a bit of fun in mind, I thought I’d relive the old days and write a guide to our next Champions League opponents, Qarabag, because let’s face it, where all of our knowledge of Azerbaijan is concerned, anything could pass for the truth.

Qarabag is situated in the Southern Caucasus region which covers the south west of Azerbaijan and Eastern Armenia. However the football team have been based in the Azerbaijani capital of Baku since 1993 rather than their spiritual home of Aghdam, which is actually over 200 miles away. The move was brought about by conflict in the Aghdam region making it unsafe to host football there.

The currency of Azerbaijan is the manat but this is largely unavailable in the UK simply because no one has ever heard of it. Instead, you’re advised to take Euros to exchange for manat once you get there, but a stash of Greggs delicacies and vintage Geordie jeans may actually make the exchange rate more favourable.

On your approach to Baku you may spot a few things that seem strangely familiar. For instance, certain parts of the outer Baku region like Marra are famous for the interbreeding of their donkeys, while places like Wheyskeyz and Nonse are run down and have what look like really shit versions of the Tyne Bridge. Strangely, all are twinned with sunderland.

Fancy a fun fact? Well, you’re getting one anyway. Qarabag’s president Tahir Gozel is a massive fan of mahogany tinted Yorkshire antique dealer, David Dickinson and runs his Azerbaijani fan club. He’s even been on Bargain Hunt back in the day. But it doesn’t end there. Not only is the training ground sponsored by Piz Buin but their home stadium is named the Azersun Arena and azersun is actually the Azerbaijani word for aftersun. Clearly, while the president loves Dicko, he’s also mindful of taking his tanning routine too far.

Two of Qarabag’s star players are branching out in a pretty successful sideline. Winger Leandro Andrade and central defender Kevin ‘Funky Cold’ Medina have been testing the water as love gurus. In fact, when the pair aren’t scoring on the pitch, they’re advising local men how to score with the ladies in their sex advice column, Shagger, written exclusively every month for the Qarabag matchday programme. In fact, such is the success of the column, the pair are about to launch a podcast along the same lines. Good luck on the sexual airwaves, lads.

Meanwhile, Qarabag goalkeeper Shahrudin Mahammadaliyev has a name that will score you 400 in Scrabble, ending any game immediately.

Interestingly, Qarabag run out to The Bay City Roller’s banger ‘Shangalang’. It’s not because it’s an absolute tune either. No, in fact the word shangalang actually roughly translates as ‘get into these’ in Azerbaijani.

If you’re off to the first leg, keep your eyes peeled for the local hooligans. Known as Baku Offa Oglan Balas their name roughly translates into Baku Aggro Boys. So if you see BOOBS written on a nearby wall, don’t build your hopes up; make a swift exit instead.

What you could do is perhaps make your way to imaginatively named local bar, Beer Station Pub which actually serves a local beer called ChitFyased coming in at a heady 14% volume. Be careful not to neck too much though or you might end up dangerously…surely you’ve got that joke? No? Wait a bit…think about that beer… it’ll land eventually.

Finally, if you notice any empty seats in the home areas of the Tofiq Bahramov stadium on Wednesday, remember that Qarabag play a long way from home. But also, a Japanese car giant have a large factory on the outskirts of the nation’s capital, so you could always just blame the Baku shift at Nissan!

So, there you have it, hopefully a useful and fairly comprehensive guide to all things Qarabag. Or just a load of juvenile lies with no offence meant…you decide!

Gallowgate Cult Heroes – David McCreery

Sometimes it’s not the silky skills, the blistering pace or the ability to conjour a goal out of nothing that makes a player a hero to a fanbase. Sometimes, it’s just down to pure graft and commitment. Our next cult hero had those things in spades.

Long before people started labelling players as things like ‘a six’ or a ‘holding midfielder’ we had players like David McCreery who did the dirty work, breaking up attacks and keeping things simple while running himself into the ground for the cause. Often it seemed that he was the focal point of the team, flying into tackles and winning the ball back in order to give it to someone to start another attack in those exciting first Keegan years.

Having played for both Manchester United and QPR, McCreery arrived on Tyneside fresh from representing Northern Ireland in the 1982 World Cup. McCreery had done well in a surprisingly positive World Cup campaign for Northern Ireland – only a defeat to France kept them out of the semi finals – and was named in the team of the tournament. Yet still he was almost unknown to Toon fans when he signed from Tulsa Roughnecks. But what an impact he’d make.

McCreery went on to make 272 appearances for the club, helping us win promotion in 1984 and staying until 1989. He was instrumental in the 1984 promotion season where despite the obvious glamour and flair of the likes of Keegan, Beardsley and Waddle, McCreery’s work rate and bravery was very much appreciated by Newcastle fans. He had a kind of scuttling running style and would race around making interceptions and breaking up opposition attacks, doing the dirty work that allowed the flair players to play. All of this way before it was trendy to be that kind of player!

Despite his somewhat small stature David seemed to be in possession of the heart of a lion. He never shirked a challenge and his work rate was superb. I’d liken him to someone like N’Golo Kante in modern terms; selfless, brave and not without the odd moment of skill. It’s safe to say that the St. James’ Park crowd took him to their hearts from very early on in his Toon career and his tough tackling approach is still fondly remembered today by those of us of a certain vintage, despite the superstar nature of the team that he started in.

Leaving Newcastle in 1989, David would go on to play for Hearts, Hartlepool (twice), Coleraine and Carlisle United before retiring from playing. Then it was into management with Carlisle and Hartlepool before his career took a bit of a swerve and he ended up in America in a role with the MLS. Later his globetrotting took him to Argentina where he took on a football consultant role.

David would also manage successfully in both Myanmar and Malaysia and nowadays he’s involved in the development of football in the UAE.

Davey Mac; a tough tackling number 6 before the internet had even thought of it and a Gallowgate Cult Hero!

Magpie Moments Episode 6

There’s never a dull week supporting Newcastle. Even in the quiet times we’ve got the likes of Big Frank Chippa to get us in the news anyway. Anyway, another week, another selection of Magpie Moments to bring back a few good memories.

Matt Ritchie, corner flag killer. Matt Ritchie is one of my personal favourite Newcastle players of all time. A gifted footballer who joined us when we were at one of our lowest points and who could be relied upon to make things happen on the pitch. But it was a time when he made something happen just off the pitch that makes for a Magpie Moment. Picture the scene. It’s January 2020 and Newcastle are at 0-0 with Chelsea at home. We have a corner cleared out to Allain Saint-Maximin who plays a beauty of a ball back in to the box where Isaac Hayden gleefully heads it into the net for a 94th minute winner. I mean, that’s a moment in itself. And then Matt Ritchie says, “Hold my pint”. As players race over to celebrate with Hayden in the Gallowgate/Milburn corner, Ritchie isn’t far behind. But he’s not after Hayden. He’s after the corner flag and proceeds to welly it so hard that it leaves the ground and goes spinning into the crowd where it catches a celebrating fan square in the family jewels. Unaware, Ritchie continues to scream at the moon. Meanwhile the fan takes a deep breath, checks it’s all still there and gingerly sits back down!

Nobby channels his inner Maradona. If you’re old enough then last year’s Carabao Cup success won’t have been the first time you saw Newcastle win a trophy. Or rather, win a tile. Yes, tile, not title (don’t ask). In 2006 Newcastle ‘won’ the Intertoto Cup (again, don’t ask). Anyway in the first leg of our two legged semi final, Nobby Solano scored an absolute wonder goal, which because I can’t find on video I have to relate back to you via a few reports and my very patchy memory. Nobby took the ball fairly deep inside his own half and exchanged passes with Gary Speed. Then, he just went all Maradona. It felt like he took on the whole Munich team before getting into the box, drawing the keeper and dinking the ball over him and into the net. At the time it felt like the best goal I’d ever seen, including Maradona’s v England at the 1986 World Cup. Nobby remains one of my favourite players to this day.

Ball Boy becomes stubborn hero! A couple of seasons ago Newcastle staged a stirring comeback to beat West Ham 4-3 at home. Harvey Barnes came off the bench to score a screamer to win it at the Gallowgate as we came back from being 1-3 down. It was a bit of a Magpie Moment. However, there was another moment in the match, just after Mohammed Kudus scored West Ham’s second goal. Kudus ran towards the Gallowgate to celebrate and wanted to do his trademark celebration of sitting on a chair relaxing. No, me neither. Needing a chair with which to fulfil this amazing celebration, he asked a nearby ball boy for his. And the ball boy just said ‘no’. It felt like Kudus asked a couple of times more, probably confused to be told ‘no’. But the ball boy stood firm. No mate, you’re not sitting on my chair to complete your stupid celebration against my club. Well done, kidda!

So, there we have it. Three more Toon related moments that emphasise the fact that feeling that almost anything can happen at Newcastle United!

NUFC: For the love of God, just get some cover in!

I read with interest yesterday that those at the club involved in transfers were planning a meeting to address the need for cover in the squad. And then I just allowed my head to rest softly in my hands and tried not to lose my mind.

I realise that there will be a lot going on in the background that we as fans never hear or even understand, despite what our social media ITKs and plane watchers would have you believe. But, seriously, did no one realise that January was going to happen? Did they miss the fact that it was creeping up? And has no one been in the treatment room lately?

It’s as clear as day that we need cover, especially in defence. I’m not here to make suggestions about players, mind you. I can’t say I watch a lot of football other than us really, so my finger just isn’t on the pulse as far as emerging talent is concerned. But I can’t stress the frustration I feel when I see the sheer amount of defensive problems we’ve been having. Schar, Lascelles, Livramento, Krafth and Dan Burn are all unavailable for varying amounts of time and no one appears to be postponing any of our upcoming fixtures. So what are we waiting for?

It’s great that we’ve discovered a couple more strings to Lewis Miley’s bow, but I’d be that bit more comfortable if we just could sign an actual defender.

There’s a need up front too. Will Osula seems to have vanished into thin air, Sean Neave is untried and possibly a bit untrusted too, leaving only Wissa and Big Nick as options. Wissa is only just back from a fairly serious injury and yet we seem happy to gamble with him staying fit.

I know that these things take time, but was the time between the start of the season and now not enough for a bit of forward planning? To still be reading that we’re monitoring players while also feeling optimistic about people returning from injury feels strange to say the least. It feels like an accident waiting to happen, in my opinion.

Maybe I’m panicking. Maybe I’m naïve. But with crucial and some might say season defining games to come over the next month, the need is now. I’m all for trusting the process, but I think that the process might need to hurry up a bit occasionally. I’m sure I’m not the only one wondering just what’s going on and waiting with everything crossed for some progress on at least a loan deal some time soon!

What do we think? Are the club right to be taking their time? Or does the current injury situation, coupled with the sheer amount of upcoming fixtures warrant a bit of urgency?

NUFC: Whatever happened to the dark arts?

Once upon a time, Eddie Howe took a team of down on their luck footballers who just seemed to be waiting for the inevitability of relegation to swallow them up and, with the help of one or two additions, turned them into a bunch of cold eyed killers for whom losing felt totally unacceptable. This was done with a dose of positivity, a total change in attitude and a healthy dollop of the dark arts.

So whatever happened to those likely lads?

Well, with a bit of investment and a lot of momentum that team we call United saved themselves from relegation, got to the Champions League and then won our first trophy in 56 years with last March’s Carabao Cup win.

Then what?

Some would say that we scraped our into the Champions League spots for this year with a run of unconvincing form that culminated in an insipid performance on the last day of last season in defeat against Everton. Something was missing and some among our ranks would say that it still is.

We used to be a team who weren’t afraid to lean on a bit of shithousery. Kicking the ball away, feigning injury to slow the game down, deliberately putting two balls on the pitch and just generally being a bit nasty, physical and in your face when it was needed. A snarling, growling beast of a team that went for the opposition’s throat with a level of success that shook up the Premier League. They even changed the rules just to put our nose out of joint a little when they decided that only one person could be in the technical area. Eddie and Jason take note. Lately though, there’s been less and less of this kind of thing.

I don’t think it’s too harsh to say that performances have been at times a bit insipid this season. None more so than what we served up at the dark place for the derby. What was needed was fight, hard work and a bit of bite, yet what we got was just passive and disorganised. Where we should have been snapping into tackles and making maximum use of the dark arts, what we actually served up was a very pale imitation of Eddie Howe’s Newcastle United.

Amongst all the calls for more creativity and flair what we need more than anything is a more back to basics approach that let’s opponents know that they’re in a game.

There have been hints at this recently in the victory against Manchester City and the first half against Chelsea where we hunted in packs and never let them settle. Yet the consistency is still lacking, even when you factor in our recent back to back wins.

I write this on the morning of the Leeds game. Aye, dirty Leeds, a team renowned for their physical approach and just a general all round nastiness since the 70s and Don Revie’s boys. They earned a reputation and just seem to have worn it like a badge of honour ever since, regardless of players or management. Elland Road too has long been a bear pit with a partisan atmosphere that starts with the dark arts before the team’s even warmed up.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating a change so drastic that we get a ‘dirty old Toon’ identity or anything similar, but it seems clear that we need to get back to at the very least making teams feel uncomfortable when they play Newcastle United. We used to knock teams out of their stride and mess with their rhythm with a box of tricks that straddled the line between right and wrong. We used to bully teams and let them know they were in a game, but this season has been an altogether more passive affair.

From Wor Flags, through the stands and all the way across every available social media platform the cry this season seems to be ‘Let’s get into these!’ and yet the occasions when it actually happens have been few and far between for a while now. It’d be great to see a return to the dark arts. It’d be great to have that snarling, spitting beast of a team back!

Howay the lads, let’s get into these again!